Town Crier

town crier –noun
1) an amazing 8 inch Qee designed by Tim Biskup (see picture)
2) a person employed by a town to make public announcements or proclamations, usually by shouting in the streets (see old lady at the bus stop)


This lady and I always ride the bus at the same time, and since we see each other often, we say good morning and such. She's a nice enough lady that puts up with repeating what she says so I can understand, but our conversations have gotten as far as "wow, look at the crow eat the trash" and "go ahead, here's the bus." Today, running late for the bus with a handful of crackers, she decides that enough is enough, and that she should know who I am and why I am still living there.

She asks if I live close by, and not wanting to seem like an old-woman stalker, I tell her the complex I live in. Her next question was if I was single, as residents of Japan are amazed that people can live on their own and not with their parents/wife to take care of them. Seeing where the conversation was going, I steered away and started talking about me being a student, and how I was working in Japan for the semester. Nothing much, just my University, and the company I work for. The bus comes, and off we go.

After work, I come back home, and at the stop before mine is a mother/daughter pair. The mother is probably in her 50's or 60's, with the daughter in her 30's. I ofcourse get the "he's not Japanese" inquisitive look, and they sit behind me. They continue to talk about me in hushed tones, mentioning my University, where I worked, my current dating status...things that strangers should not know about me. Curious where this new found knowledge came from, I thought back. All the way to this morning.

If you ever need to get a message to an entire borough in Japan, tell an old lady. Atleast this will save me from answering a few questions whenever I meet someone new.

This Means Nothing Without Pictures

Saturday morning was spent trying to find the post office. Once I did, I discovered they were closed, and will only be open while I am at work. I was told that I could buy stamps at a convenience store, but I have no idea how much postage I should put on each letter.

Afterwards, I needed to break a 10,000 yen bill so I could easily get an all day bus/subway pass. I had time before I was going to meet people at the aquarium, so I stopped by a coffee shop near my apartment. The coffee was alright, I guess, but the waitress was really interested in where I was from and practicing English, so we might get together next weekend to practice.

I finally took some pictures around my apartment:


I caught the bus to the station, the train to the other station, and walked to the aquarium. I met with Kimihiko and Yohei, and took the best picture...ever:

After the revelation, we went to a replica of a Venetian village, then I headed home to nap. I wanted to go to Sakae, the club district, and the last bus out of my area to the station was at 10pm. The first bus back from the station was at 6:15am. So if I wanted to go out at all, it would have to be for all night. I napped, and by napped, I mean played Castlevania until 9:30, got dressed, and caught the last bus.

I didn't really have a plan on where to go, but I had read about this English pub. Really wanting a London Porter, I went there hoping to find. Ofcourse, I got lost first, but the area was interesting to walk around in. There's a small park running the length of the road, with a TV tower at one end that looked like the Eiffel Tower. A group of kids were playing music in the park, and seeing as how my ipod died on the train ride there, I stood around and listened.

I finally found the English pub, and had a feeling of not fitting in. Well, technically, the feeling was fitting in too much. I can't stand not standing out, and in a rural area of Japan, I stand out almost always. In this bar, it was all really drunk American and Australian people, as well as a few desperate looking Japanese girls that looked close to 40. They didn't have London Porter, so after a quick Negra, I took off. I just didn't want to hang around there anymore.

I tried to find another bar, but the majority in the area were either hostess bars, or members only. I debated going to a club, but couldn't justify $30 to listen to awful pre-recorded dance music by myself. I apparently wandered into the redlight district, which I often do, and as soon as I was offered a massage on the street, I knew I wasn't going to meet anyone I wanted to get to know in the area. It was only midnight or so at this time, and I still had 6 hours to kill. I walked over to Osu, a couple train stations away, to look for graffiti to photograph. Most of it was bad tags, and I couldn't find the big tentacle piece that I had seen a couple days earlier.

Disappointed with the rebellious youth of Japan's artistic talent, I stumbled on a Denny's. So, yet again, it was my hotel for the night. Flipping through the menu, I made a profound discovery. Chicken Jambalaya. Intrigued, I ordered it. A horrible mistake. A combination of stale rice, what I later discovered to be hot dog slices, chicken pieces, and mayonnaise did not sit well with me. I sat in the Denny's, in pain, for the next few hours dozing over Gulliver's Travels. I finally catch the first train back, showered, then slept until noon. Today will be a much more lowkey day, in hopes to save money. I have some pictures to organize, some stuff to finish reading, emails to write, and laundry to do. Fun fun fun.

Oh, and a Flickr update.


EDIT: I always forget things that I intend to mention. First, at the aquarium, there was a giant robotic penguin that danced and sang "The Yellow Rose of Texas." I have never been more appalled and entertained at the same time. Second, this Japanese comedy troupe from some tv show was at the replica village filming a segment, which included multiple camera pans of me standing there watching. Then us slowly edging our way towards the camera while filming. I only hope that I can catch it on tv or someone uploads it to youtube.

The Great Experiment In Comforting People/Making Them Uneasy

Blah blah blah work.

After work, I run by the little general store to buy something to seal envelopes with, seeing as how I picked the only envelopes that are not self adhesive. There, the clerk that I always get, strikes up an indepth conversation that went along the following lines:

Her: "Tape, huh? Didn't you buy paper and envelopes just the other day?"
Me: "Yep"
Her: "Mailing letters and need to close the envelopes?"
Me: "I don't understand"
Her: "To close the envelopes"
Me: "Sure...my Japanese is really bad"
Her: "See you next time!"
Me: "Yep"

Normally employees at stores go out of their way to avoid saying anything besides "Hello," and "Come again," especially to someone that doesn't look Japanese. So it caught me off guard. I'm proud to say that I've started confusing Japanese and English, and often times can't remember which language someone asked me something, nor which language I answered with. This makes me happy because I take it as a sign that I'm more thoroughly understanding the language. Of I've just become extremely absent minded. Most people have a stigma about languages, like feeling uncomfortable using a particular language outside of the environment they're used to using it. Like someone raised to speak Vietnamese around their family, but English everywhere else. There is often a barrier of extreme discomfort when using Vietnamese outside of their family, which they're most used to. Hopefully, this means any sort of barrier I have of using Japanese in a classroom setting is gone.

After this amazing revelation, I head over to the super market to pick up some peanut butter and trash bags. There, I find nirvana. I see a bag that says miniature donuts. Ok, I'll give it a try. I'm assuming some sort of mildly donut flavored discs. Like cookie crisp isn't really tiny cookies, it's discs that kind of taste like cookies. These tiny donuts are just that; tiny, individually wrapped, donuts. The novelty has yet to wear off.

Coming home from the high of finding tiny donuts (and eating one on the way home), I find another unique surprise that I can only hope is restricted to Japan. Porn in my mail box. No, I didn't sign up for anything. Actually, they can't deliver mail to my apartment that's addressed to me until I drop off this form (tomorrow, tomorrow, I'll do it tomorrow). Not used to naked people being freely exposed among my coupons, I quickly decided to mail the less racy of the two pamphlets to a good friend in the states. We can only hope she appreciates my discretion.

After a tiring day filled with porn and tiny donuts, I just don't feel like a) going out for all of 2 hours before I have to head back to my apartment or b) going out and staying out all night, then meeting people tomorrow at 1. So I opted for option c) finish writing letters and emails to people, then run in the rain until I feel like passing out. Sounds just fine to me.

But tomorrow should...hopefully...be an eventful day. A morning trip to the post office, followed by running around taking pictures around my apartment. Afterwards, a trip to the curry shop to flirt with cute curry girl some more and try to cajole a meeting for coffee or something tomorrow night. At 1, a trip to the aquarium is planned, which will inevitably lead to eating. So much eating. After that, depending on the coffee situation, a trip back to the apartment to nap. Now, I feel like I need something a bit more along the lines of a unique Japanese adventure. Last time I was here, I was attacked by a little girl on the train, locked out of my hotel, sang karaoke with an 85 year old man and his wife, among other, mildly interesting stories. So I've decided to sleep as much as I can tonight, and tomorrow after the aquarium, wake up in time to take the last bus to the station, and just hang around Sakae all night. The trains start running again around 5 or 6 am, so I should be back at the apartment around 7. Worse comes to worst, I'll be incredibly tired, probably wet from the rain, but atleast it will be another story to tell. Boy do I love stories.

And grand experiments. I've noticed that people on trains/buses/the street try, for the most part, to avoid eye contact with people passing by as much as possible. Being tall, and non-Japanese, I do catch a lot more looks before they have time to look away. So I plan to exploit this, and try an experiment. Every person I make eye contact with over the next few days, I will smile the biggest, cheesiest smile possible (or atleast a smile with teeth...I have a big mouth). I will then log their reaction. So far, the categories I've come up with have been:
Look away and not look again
Look away, but then quickly look back
Smile back
Continue to stare, but not smile
Look horribly uncomfortable and embarrassed
GASP, actually say something??

I will also try to categorize the people based on gender and an age estimate. I'm really curious what will happen when I try this in the States, too. We'll see. Oh yes we will.


EDIT: This guy I work with looks just like Open Face from Pete and Pete.

Sapporo Ramen

Work work work, then leave immediately for Nagoya station. There, I make a quick trip to Sofmap to pick up Mother 1 and 2, then meet with Sayana, Kimihiko, Yohei, and Nakamura. We eat ramen from Sapporo, apparently, which tastes a whole lot like the ramen I've had here. We then ran through several bookstores, and tried to find a way to see the skyline from the 51st floor without paying. Unfortunately, there were no windows in the lobby, nor near the bathroom. Other than that, a fairly normal day. These posts are just going to get shorter and shorter as fewer things stand out during the day. We made plans to go to the aquarium on Saturday, as well as flirt with Cute Curry Girl then as well. I still haven't had a chance to go to the club area yet, so I think tomorrow I'll come home from work, run, shower, eat, nap, then leave for Sakae on the last bus. Stay around Sakae until about 5am or so, then head back to my apartment to sleep until noon. Sounds good to me. We'll see how awake I am tomorrow to try it.

Highlight

Yesterday and today were fairly boring. I worked and watched BSG yesterday, while today, I watched Heroes and wrote letters. Great fun all around. My highlight of the day was watching some kid try to spit, and end up getting it all over his shirt and pants. There's really very little reason for you to need to spit, but the surprised look on his face made it worth it. Tomorrow I meet friends for ramen and will probably miss the bus back home. Stupid rural-area apartment. Where are the flying cars and jet packs I was promised existed in Japan? Not in Nakagawa-ku, that's for sure. We have old people. And cats. And lots of bicycles.

Hutou And Fried Pork

So I've pretty much given up on trying to go out to eat on days when the only bentos they have are ones with beef or pork. I just bring ramen too, give away the offending material, and eat what's left of both. It's a fairly good system, atleast so far. Although I'm still fairly hungry, with nothing in the apartment of substance. I have old apples, old bananas, yogurt milk, a tiny bit of peanut butter, and some twice-microwaved tentacles from a creature I'm unsure of.

Work in the clean room is great. Not only do I do actual work, and not just busy work, but I talk about music all day, and am given candy at random intervals. I'm not sure if they give me candy out of pity, or some sort of reward, but it helps me stay awake.

I really do miss walmart, as much as I can't stand the store at times. I tried to find stationary and envelopes today, which I found out requires a trip to the stationary store, several buses away. Come on, I just want something to put paper in so I can mail it. I'm amazed at how difficult it is to get a simple envelope.

Oh, and it's freezing outside. I'm sure not as cold as it is in Texas...stupid Texas...but still, really, really cold. I've started running at night; not for exercise or anything of the sort, because honestly, I don't care too much about my health. My lack of concern for my health results in me being healthy. But no, I run at night just to look around the neighborhood. I pick a direction, and run that way until I get tired. Then my poor planning skills kick in, and I have to force myself to make it back after exhausting myself on the way there. Riverboat Gamblers and In Flames make a perfect playlist for running in the rain among old people. As does giant headphones that not only inflict my taste of music on others, but keep my ears warm.

Big plans for the night; more tentacles, running, and hopefully BSG will be finished after I shower.

Weekend

Friday Night:
I fell asleep on my floor and listening to Explosions In The Sky at about 11pm. I moved to my "bed" at about 3am.

Saturday:
I was supposed to meet Yohei at Nagoya Station at 3:30, but I wanted to go by this vinyl store in Osu. I got directions, and left a bit early to go to Osu. The store was actually pretty cool, reminiscent of Gomi, but they didn't have the Eric So Pointman, nor the infamous Eric So Hellboy. They did have a lot of Kozik stuff, though, which I was surprised to see outside of the US. I ended up buying tiny guitars that serve no purpose, except to make me want to buy more.

The current fashion fad in Japan for girls is to wear tiny skirts or shorts, with street walker boots. The wind, many, many stairs, and people's carelessness resulted in more panties being exposed in my general direction than I thought possible. Honestly, it's winter, aren't you cold?

I headed to Nagoya Station at around 2 to walk around, then wait for Yohei. Nagoya Station has a lot of stores, which I guess is find if you want to buy clothes, or shoes, or cake, but nothing really interesting. I decided to grab some food before I met with Yohei, and I stumbled on a curry shop. The curry was alright, but this girl that works there easily has the best smile ever. We talked for a bit and I left her my cellphone address, but I have little faith in my horrible Japanese and what I can get across when using it.

I met with Yohei and we headed off to another station. There, we went to some donut shop to meet up with Nakamura and Kimihiko; and have a delicious almond donut. We then walk around this bookstore/sub-culture/probably a head shop, then go off to meet more AIESEC members at this huge shopping complex.

We had to take a train to the station, then a shuttle bus took us to the shopping complex. I was amazed. There, after a maze of stairs, we went to a cafe that specialized in parfaits. Now, it's winter, and it's cold, but that doesn't stop people from eating 7 parfaits at a time. A little bell sat on our table that we were supposed to ring, calling the servers. We would ring it, just to entice others to order more parfaits. Between three people, they ate 16 or so parfaits total. I was amazed, and satisfied with my seafood pasta.

Afterwards, we went to a bowling alley/arcade nearby. I suck at bowling, with the exception of wii bowling, and suck even more when the largest shoes they have are still 4 cm too small to be a tight fit. I get a ride to my apartment from Kimihiko, and call it a night. I've moved my bed to the floor also, instead of that stupid bedshelf. It just makes more sense, I can lay in bed and type, or watch tv, or not wake up and think I'm in a coffin. All are benefits.

Sunday:
Kimihiko picked me up today, and we went to the train station (avoiding the bus). We met with Nakamura at the entrance to a shrine pathway. Today was an anniversary for...something...and in honor of this, all the shrines in the area were open, and vendors abound. I'm always reminded of a combination of fairs when I walk through vendors on the way to a shrine. And that Bible story where Jesus ejected all the vendors out of the church. Well, these vendors make some mighty fine dango.

Visiting a shrine presents some problems for a tall, caucasian male. First, I stand out, and especially at a shrine that was rebuilt after WW2 because of bomb damage. Secondly, as the Japanese population ages, they seem to shrink. There were people literally knee high to me. I think I stepped on some lady's forehead in the process of getting to the shrine.

Over a lunch of chicken and rice, I learned a valuable lesson. Never, never answer the question "what sort of girls do you like" when around Japanese friends. Immediately after, anytime we saw someone that even remotely fit into the category I described, I would get jabs, and points, and gestures.

Bored with the shrine, we went to Osu, with the intention I thought of just to waste time. Apparently, the true intention was to visit stores in which potential dates for a foreigner might be found. For the record, the furniture store was a fairly nice store, but we really didn't need to go to the glasses stores.

We wandered for a bit with more jabs, when we decided to start to head back. At Sakae, I wanted to walk around a bit, and seeing as how I had an all day subway pass, it wouldn't cost me anything more. I parted with everyone there, to wander a bit, get rained on, then get back on the train. After a train and bus ride, a quick trip to the grocery store was necessary. I mistakenly bought "yogurt milk" the other day, and I had to rectify it as soon as possible. So here I sit, eating some sort of tentacles they had on sale at the store, and drinking cloudy water flavored with lemon? Melon? Well, hopefully it's flavored. And purposely cloudy.

I'm Tired Of Titles

Nothing much happened today. Worked in the clean room again, forgot to order lunch so I ate ramen that brought with me, and stood in the cold for 30 minutes waiting for a bus. I did happen to write an entire song today, so as soon as I find a cheap guitar here, and a mic, something may come from it. Time to waste time until I head out for the night.

7,000 Tiny Bullets And Coffee Exploits

It's amazing how much your mind wanders when you're set to do repetitive tasks and have no idea what it is your actually doing. Especially when you only understand maybe 1/4 of what people are saying around you.

So today I worked in the clean room again, which honestly, I enjoy. The work I do in there doesn't seem like busy work, since other people are doing it too. Plus, I get to talk about punk music and hardcore, not to mention get away from Crotch Fat and Muppet.

So I go to the room, and Kid Boss gives me and this other guy instructions. Kid Boss looks like he's maybe 13, but has this weird superiority attitude sometimes, and takes everything really seriously. I piss him off by yelling things in English at him, then pretending it wasn't me.

So our instructions are to use an air compressor to make sure there is no dust in these freshly-tefloned pipe pieces, then wrap them in aluminum foil and tape, sealing everything off. Ok, that's fine; I like arts and crafts, and this is pretty much like a giant stencil. And I do happen to have stencil making experience.

So me and this other guy clean them, then sit down to start wrapping them. I'm trying to think of a nickname for this guy, but nothing is coming to me. He's just really quiet. So I started thinking of calling him Mouse or something...but then the smell came. This kid just sat there, creating all sorts of new and horrible stenches. Now I HAD to incorporate this into his nickname. There's the immature names such as Silent Smell or something, but it just didn't fit. I look down at the table where there are these forms spread out, and I see it; Assy. It's some sort of abbreviation for some sort of coating, but it was just so perfect. So from now on, he's known as Assy to me.

Assy and I finish up the pipes, and go to lunch. Afterwards, we're given these tiny little things that look like rows of bullets. We're supposed to arrange them in this special grate for some reason that I have no idea. Since I also don't know what they are used for, I'll just assume they are bullets for tiny Japanese guns. I arranged about 7,000 of them. I spent the day imagining what sort of person carries such a tiny gun. I really should be more productive; like write songs while I'm doing this stuff...or something.

5 rolls around, and apparently I'm one of the few people that leave then. I meet the head honcho in the office, and the current president is there too. We talk for a bit, and I find out that I'll be working in the clean room for a couple more days. Fine with me. I find a shirt in the cafeteria that has my name on it, so I take it. They've given me 4 entire sets of clothing, plus shoes and jackets. Too bad they're all too short, and I'll never wear them unless I'm dealing with spraying actual teflon.

I head to the bus, hoping I can just catch the early bus. One leaves at 4:53, the other at 5:31. So obviously, I try to get out in time for the earlier one, but haven't made it so far. It's freezing outside, and me in a stylish undershirt and UT sweater, I try to find a vending machine with hot coffee in it. It isn't hard, so I figure I'll warm myself with the coffee so I can brave the cold for the next 30 minutes. There's about 7 varieties of coffee made by 1 company, and some are served hot, some cold. Being indecisive, I choose one at random. Stupid me, I choose one served cold. I wasn't even paying attention. So I drink my cold coffee, which gives me super shakes; a combined effect of the coffee and the cold.

I slowly walk back to the bus stop with nothing really to do, so I stare at cars. It's great. People think you can't see in cars, but when you stare right where they should be, they always have great expressions. Then some office girl comes by on her bike. Now I still haven't actually met her, but she works in the office, and makes a point to dangerously cross the street so she can pass by the bus stop I'm at. She always says something in Japanese, and I've taken it upon myself to say a new English phrase each day as she passes. Today it was something like "Drive Safe!" as she swerves against the wind on her bike. It's surprising how easily you can win people over here just by smiling at them, which really isn't a common thing. Most people just stare at the ground or look the other way in passing. At most, you might get a tiny bow. Screw that. I'm from Texas. We're known for being overtly friendly. Or something like that.

I get off a stop early to buy some more hangers. I need to wash clothes, but there's no dryer around, so I have to hang dry my clothes. I'm also not sure if I bought normal detergent, or bleach...I didn't read the word bleach anywhere on it, but I'll test it on a wash cloth and some white clothes first. OH. I can't read the washing machine either. Stupid Kanji. Another day, another adventure.

So on my way back, I almost cause a car accident! It was great! I'm walking along the sidewalk, and for the record, I'm probably the only non-Japanese person in about a 5-mile radius. Atleast. I'm the only non-Asian person in about a 9 or 10 mile radius. So I'm used to the looks I get. Well, on the sidewalk, some lady goes to turn into a drug store. I'm nowhere near the turn-in, so she doesn't stop for fear of hitting me, or someone else. She just stops and stares at me, half in the driveway, half in the street. A truck turns the corner blowing his horn. She finally comes to and pulls quickly into the driveway. I hope I made the old lady's day.

Every lunch, there are these three guys that study English everyday, and are really devoted to it. They've only been studying for about 3 months, but they're surprisingly good, and we hold conversations in English really well. So today we're practicing after lunch, when head honcho sneaks over with a camera. Suddenly, I'm swarmed by English learning people trying to squeeze into the picture. Something about the situation just doesn't sit well with me. I don't know, it kind of gives the wrong impression. I can just see them putting a picture like that in a newsletter or something saying "Our employees actively learn English with a native speaker," or "we employee international students to broaden our horizons." I did none of these things, nor was I asked to by the company. These are just three people that really want to learn English, and I need a break from trying to speak and understand Japanese every once in a while.

A completely separate, mildly unrelated thought: handling really delicate, expensive items and concentrating on wrapping them safely, while holding a conversation in an unfamiliar language is really hard to do. Incredibly difficult.

There's been a dramatic lack of any sort of alcohol over the past few days, and I miss the sweet nectar known as Japanese beer. Hopefully this will be resolved tomorrow. Oh, and hopefully I can find a girl that lives nearby that has a western bed. That's really my only requirement at this moment. And preferably with short hair. And glasses. And, while we're at it, fairly tall. And American pillows, or atleast throw pillows on the couch. I'd never return to my apartment again.

I intended to take some pictures around my apartment, the area it's in and such, but seeing how it's dark, and painfully cold, I'll wait until Saturday or so.

Nya Nya

Dear America,
http://www.toshiba.co.jp/product/etsg/cmt/au/w45t/w45t_menu.htm

Love,
Aaron

P.S. If only they had drivers for Mac...

INTERNET

Finally, I have internet. I can't explain how much I missed it. I made plans to go try to find a bar near the train station tonight, but just out of curiosity, I tried it; and it worked. Screw trying to find a crappy bar for an hour, I can do that some other day. I need to let my parents know that I'm alive. I tried emailing them from my phone, but I couldn't remember their email address, so I wasn't sure if the emails that were accepted actually went to them, or to someone with a similar email address. Anyway, it's nice to finally be able to be in contact with people again.

So today was a pretty boring day. The cold, wet weather turned slutty skirt bus girl into weird, child's shoes wearing high pitched M.C. Giggles. Walking to the company from the bus, we started talking, and she has THE highest pitched voice ever. Almost cartoon like. And her shoes kind of reminded me of children's shoes. I'm not sure why. So after a rousing morning meeting, I'm sent to the research department with Crotch Fat. Awesome. Another day of folding aluminum foil and listening to Crotch Fat and Muppet talk to themselves. Oh, no, not today. Today I learned a new word. That word is "haregane." It means steel wire. I spent the next 4 hours cutting wire by hand to a desired length. Boy, was it fun.

After 4 hours of wire cutting, I left for lunch. Since today was fried pork bits, I decided to go to a nearby Udon shop. Well, not wanting me to be alone, some people from the office came with me, and we all ate together. The food was good, and after a morning with Crotch Fat and Muppet, anyone's company is better by comparison. After lunch, I get sent to a different area in the research department; the clean room. So I put on a lab coat, hat, and go through an x-files-esque wind tunnel to find people sitting there, sanding pipes. Oh, and more wire. I spend the next 2 hours cutting wire thicker than before, and end up slicing my hand.

Some kid comes up to me and gestures for me to follow. We take some pipes to another floor, where through a series of grunts, this kid washes the pipes in some chemical, then hands it to me. Now I don't have gloves on, he does, we both have gas masks on, but he seems fine with me not wearing gloves. Let's hope my hands don't fall off.

So after that, I take the pipes back to the clean room, where I am shown how to cover the pipes with tape and plastic. Ok. So I do that for two hours and talk to some guy about Japanese punk and American hardcore bands. That was actually fairly interesting. At 4:45 the manager calls me, gives me a jacket, and tells me to head home. Awesome. Although the bus doesn't come until 5:30. So I sit around outside for a while waiting for the bus and trying to understand the high pitched voice OL's that pass yelling things to me.

Between the futon and cutting wire all day, I really need a massage, but I don't trust my Japanese enough to try to find an actual massage parlor. It's Japan, there probably aren't any genuine massage parlors. Now, I don't really have a problem with "sexy massage" establishments, it just goes against my frugality and refusal to pay for someone's erotic-attention. Is that a word? Maybe I can convince winking grocery girl to rub my shoulders. Or find someone that lives nearby with a western bed. A real bed. And American pillows. Now that could work.







INTERBLAGS, FINALLY!

True First Day

I'd like to point out that I still don't have internet. I got the access code, so now I can be teased with internet, but still can't have it. I emailed the company from my phone, so we'll see if they ever respond. I'm getting withdrawal symptoms. Shakes and the heebies. Of the jeebie sort.

There are several other things that I've discovered Japanese people are fascinated about foreigners, specifically me. First, your exact height. Now, I am a fairly tall person for the most part, and even in the US I get asked how tall I am. It's not too abnormal, but here, they expect you to argue with them that you're not really 187 cm when you say you're 185. I don't care which one I am. I just go into basic Japanese mode, where I stop listening, and just nod. You'd be amazed at how useful that has been just today.

Second thing Japanese people seem to be fascinated with is my age. When I introduced myself to the entire company, I made a point to say that I was a University Student. One would think that a University student would probably be, what, under 22? 23? Noooo, I get asked how old I am constantly at work, on the bus, at ramen shops, and when I say 21, I get a huge range of responses. From being called Aaron-chan to being called some sort of amazing genius for coming to Japan at such an age, to big winks at me and explanations how this should be a good experience for me. I get it, I'm younger than you. I'm not after your job, so don't feel threatened.

Third, and most important thing on the population of Japan's mind is my current dating status. Today, just today, I have been asked no less than 15 times if I currently have a girlfriend. The response is always the same, 今、いません。 Not right now. Yet somehow, this opens the realm for them to ask if I like Japanese girls, which I'm not going to lie, the answer is yes. But, it's just odd when you're being asked this, and slutty skirt bus girl is sitting right there trying not to make eye contact with me. No, bus girl, I'm not interested in you; you haven't even made an effort to introduce yourself to me, so I will just continue flirting with tall OL in broken Japanese; thank you very much.

Today I woke up, got ready, and jumped on the bus to work. On the bus was slutty skirt bus girl, but I had no idea she worked at the same company. All I know is, is that this girl was wearing a skirt far too short for this early in the morning. And this cold. She gets off at the stop before mine, I get off at my stop, and as I'm walking to the building, I see her walking towards the building from the other way. Great, she'll think I'm a stalker. Super. I made a point of waiting a loooooong time after she started going up the stairs to go up after her, for fear of her claiming I stalked her and looked up her skirt. This is Japan, you know.

So I go to the cafeteria, which is odd; Japanese companies are just like schools. They have uniforms, serve lunches, have groups and cliques and clubs and divisions based on what floor you work on and where you sit. It's odd. So the supervisor talks, tells me to introduce myself, and I do so. Then everyone scatters while I'm pulled aside and given a locker. Ok, a place to put my coat and bag. That's good. No no no, the locker is for my clothes, I have a uniform. Great. I lug all these clothes for work, and now I have a uniform I have to wear for the next month until I start to work in the office. Plus, it's a Japanese uniform, which means the pants are too short. Super; what a great day.

Smiley the supervisor then pulls me into a room where we watch a video on the company again, and he pauses it to interject his thoughts. He then hands me an envelope with about $450 in yen as a prepayment for this month, and continues. Awesome. Now he has my attention. We then discuss the magic of fluropolymers until lunch. Lunch time comes and all the kids gather in the cafeteria. I eat while Crotch Fat guy talks in super fast Japanese at me. All the while, I'm discussing the Clash and Ramones with this guy sitting next to me, and Crotch Fat doesn't realize it. I then get pulled aside by three other people who take me to a room, and demand that I help them practice English.

These three guys practice English everyday after lunch, and really, I'm surprised at their dedication. The reasons behind it were actually good reasons too; not my cheesy "I like the culture" or such. One guy wanted to learn because Japanese is only spoken in Japan, and English is so much more widespread. Yeah, makes sense. Another guy said he wanted to do something more internationally oriented, and that was why. It was a nice break from me struggling in Japanese and trying to understand to just speaking English with some people. I haven't had that chance since Saturday with Sayako, and while that might seem that long, believe me, it is. Unfettered English for the native speaker is really relaxing when you've been worrying about speaking another language so much.

So after practice, I go back to the cafeteria where another announcement is made, and I discover that I am freezing. I move back to the meeting room with Smiley where we sit. For a while. Then, he hands me off to Crotch Fat and off we go to the research lab. Ok, that's fine with me. I get introduced to Muppet, and believe me, this guy sounds like one. He always talks to himself and laughs, and his laugh is this weird, deep, haughty laugh, so I always think he's making fun of someone. Anyway, I sit down and spend the next 4 hours folding aluminum foil in half and listening to Crotch Fat and Muppet fire questions at me. I have no idea why I was folding aluminum foil, what it might be used for, or anything; just that's what they asked me to do, and I was bored.

I'd ask questions back at them, but I have yet to meet anyone at the company that has any sort of true personality. No one knows any decent Japanese bands, and they all listen to pop and Madonna. No one knows any good Japanese Art-House movies that I mention, and forget lo-brow or graffiti art. It's painful to try and listen to a guy explain the wonders of clothes shopping with his wife, or spending 6 hours reading Japanese comic books at a cafe. Not even good comics! Creepy love comics. Sigh.

So after the folding of aluminum foil, I finished the roll, was sent down to Smiley again, who told me to change and go home, since it was about 5 minutes to 5pm anyway. I do so, and go to the bus where I await slutty skirt bus girl so I know I am on the right bus. She never shows, but I do get on the correct bus, where I head home to try and get internet. No luck. I email them from my phone, and go to the convenience store to buy ramen for tomorrow's lunch. I can't eat pork or beef, so obviously fried pork pieces is out; so I'm bringing my own. I then pass a ramen shop that's closed everytime I pass, so I go in. I'm the only one there, and the shop owner is nice. We talk for a bit while my food is being prepared, I eat, head home, and here I am. I've started making a list of people I meet with their names, how I remember them, and how I met them. It's a fairly interesting list with names such as Crotch Fat and Muppet, which I've incorporated here. Meh, time to shower.

Monday

Another day, another series of events that makes me think that Japan is the most quirky place on earth. I head to work this morning, where I meet Yohei, Aya, and Ayumi on the bus. We all ride together to my workplace, where we sit in a room for a long period of time. Kimihiko shows up, and that's when we leave...

We drop Ayumi and Aya off at the train station, so Yohei, Kimihiko, and I go run around doing errands. Oh, so many errands. First we went to get my foreign registration card. Ofcourse, that requires a set of pictures, so we had to go get those too. Coming back, we wait and wait and wait, until finally they ask me for $6, then tell me to wait until February.

Next stop is the bank to set up an account so my work can pay me. But wait, before I get a bank account, I have to get a stamp for my name. See, in Japan, signing stuff means nothing, you have to have a tiny little stamp, which anyone can buy an exact copy of your's. Obviously they don't have my name in stamp form, unless I want one specially made for $70, so we select one from a wall that has two characters that somehow remotely sound like my name; A-Ru, something like that.

Stamp in hand, we go to the bank, where we fill out paperwork. A lot of paperwork. What made it difficult was that not only was it in Japanese, but I had to repeatedly write my address in Japanese, plus they kept on requiring crazy formats for the date. 2006 doesn't exist in this particular bank, as it does everywhere else in the world. No no, you need to put the year the emperor has been ruling for, so it's like 17 or 82 or something. I deposit a whopping $10 in my account, and they tell me that they'll mail everything to me. So much waiting.

Next, we go to find a cell phone. Now, I've really needed one since I still don't have internet in my apartment, because I need to email my parents to let them know I'm still alive. We go to Soft Bank, and it ends up they don't have contracts for the short period that I am going to be there. So we drive around, witness an intense car accident, and go to a shopping center. There, they talk Japanese really, really quickly around me, and I'm told to select a phone. Ahhh, Japanese phones. Does your phone have a 4 megapixel camera and flash? What about a GPS built in, where you can not only track yourself, but your friends too? A Japanese-English/English-Japanese dictionary? And so much more that I haven't discovered yet.

More talking, more paper signing, more stamping, and I have myself a phone. If you ever want to impress someone in Japan, sign something. It's great. Everytime I sign a document, in English, with my messy, looping cursive handwriting that's scrawled in .05 seconds, I get gasps of amazement. People not even with me, just standing near, would say things such as "cool," or "amazing." Yes. Yes it is.

It takes a while for the phone to be ready, so we eat, then buy some much wanted peanut butter. We pick up the phone, and head back to my office.

There, we again sit in a room and drink coffee for a while, watching some guy smoke. He then takes us around the building, introducing me to people that I still can't remember their names, and says that's it, he'll take me home. So he drives me home, I buy some bread to go with my peanut butter, and sit here about to have a sandwich with delicious nut milk. Mmmm.



ADDED: Oh, and having a middle name is awesome in Japan. It's so easy to confuse people. I have to write my information down on forms last name, first name, middle name. So at the bank, while waiting, this girl would periodically call me up for...pretty much no reason. She called me by my last name, plus -sama, which is the correct way (although -sama denotes that I'm in a higher position than her, which is a bit odd for me). Then the next time, she called me by my middle name plus -sama. She did that a few times, then suddenly switched to my first name and -sama. We placed bets on what she would call me next. Great fun.

Important Note

Japanese milk kind of tastes like some sort of nut.

Later Sunday

Well, I had a fairly productive afternoon. I found out that Japan loves charging $5 bucks for 3 apples, although 3 very good looking apples, which I purchased. I also found out that walmart is a God send in America. Desperately needing an iron, ironing board, hangers, outlet adapter, and pillow, I had to go to 3 different stores. 2 of which are a good 30 minute bus/train ride away.

I wander around a bit more and find a general...junk shop. Inside, I find hangers and an ironing board, but no iron. Ofcourse. Because it's what I really need before tomorrow. I was happy to find hangers, though, so all the clothes on my floor could finally be put in my closet, although wrinkled. I go back and start hanging up my clothes.

I would like to note that in japan, they have a crazy system of trash distribution. You have three bags, one for burnable garbage, non-burnable, and recyclable. Well, isn't cardboard recyclable...AND burnable? It doesn't have a recyclable icon on it, though. I have no idea where it goes, and with all this new item purchasing and Japan's love for packaging material, I have a lot or garbage to distribute.

So I'm hanging up clothes when some crazy music starts playing. I'm not using the microwave, so it can't be that. Must be the doorbell. Oddly enough, the doorbell connects to a phone in the apartment, and phone with no numbers, and whose only purpose is to be used to talk to the person at the door...8 ft away.

Yohei arrives and I explain how desperately I need an iron. Off we go to Nagoya station. A bus and a train ride later, we wander around the station and find Bic Camera, where I buy the cheapest iron there, as well as a power adapter for my laptop. Yay! I still don't have internet, but atleast I can watch scrubs now and listen to music without worrying about the laptop dying. We then set out to find a pillow, which is a difficult procedure in Japan. Not so much that finding the pillow is hard, just finding one under $80 is difficult. Walmart, I miss you.

We go to a store that sells house goods and bedding, and the cheapest pillow I can find is $30, without a cover, and is bright pink. I'm about to purchase it when Yohei finds a bunch of throw pillows. Screw it, they're soft, not exactly normal sized for a pillow, but at $10 for the pillow and $10 for the cover, I'm fine with it. Hopefully my neck will be too.

We then make plans for tomorrow morning, my first day of work, but I'm still unsure of what those plans are at the moment. Yohei said that he and two other girls were going to come with me to my work, then take me to get a cell phone and my residence card. Now, from what I understood in Japanese, he said they would be at my apartment at 7:37am. Well, the bus I need to be on leaves at that exact time, so now I'm curious if he meant that he would meet me on the bus at 7:37. The more I think about it, the more it makes sense, since that bus comes from the station, so they'll probably just ride it from the station and I'll jump on at my stop. It's good that I reflect on these things, otherwise, I may have been late for my first day.

I guess I should iron, eat a $1.50 apple, maybe some crackers, shower, watch some scrubs and go to sleep. I really should keep a budget so I can keep track of my money. I'll do that now. Hopefully it won't be too bad until I get paid. Which I'm not sure when that is either. This job is a hoax.

Still No Internet

Yep, so I ran around buying food and stuff for my apartment today. Oh, and the makers of my microwave tried to make it the cutest thing possible. When finished, it plays this crazy song, which won't stop even if you open the door.

I need some peanut butter. I couldn't find that at the store. I also desperately need an iron before tomorrow. Oh, and my three pronged plug for my laptop charger doesn't exactly fit into the two pronged outlets in my apartment. I need to fix that soon.

Other than that, I enjoy it here. Some people are coming over later tonight, and hopefully we can find an iron and an adapter, then get some food. And a normal pillow. These corn filled pillows in Japan just don't cut it; my neck is full of knots at this moment. Anyway, time for ramen.

So I've Arrived In Nagoya

I woke up early this morning to email a friend to meet her for breakfast in Harajuku before I left for Nagoya. So I'm emailing her back and forth, and while waiting for a response, I exchange some money, and run to the train station to buy my ticket for Nagoya. I buy it, then email my friend in Nagoya to tell him when I should be arriving. I run back to the hotel, and finalize plans to me Sayako at the bakery I always go to, then visit Secret Base, where I plan to waste large amounts of money on hand painted designer vinyl.

Well, I go to Harajuku, get some food at the bakery, and sit for a bit reading. I get ready to head to Secret Base, as Sayako hadn't arrived yet, and then she did. We hung out for a while, and I lost track of time. I ended up not having time to go to Secret Base, which is probably for the best, and ran back to my hotel.

I was already running late, so I changed my train ticket to Nagoya for 40 minutes later, emailed Yohei in Nagoya, then checked out.

Carrying any sort of luggage larger than a backpack is a huge pain in Japan, and I was carrying luggage that weighed about the same as the average Japanese person. I get on the train, go to a different station, get on the shinkansen for Nagoya, and finally arrive.

I go to meet Yohei in Nagoya, can't find the place, go to ask directions, and while leaving the office, run into another AIESEC member. We find Yohei and group together, then go to my office to meet with the president and chairman of the company.

Everyone I met at the company was extremely nice, and we all went out to eat after meeting with them. More and more food appeared, along with Japanese beer, and it was great fun. I'll hardly remember anyone's name, but it's ok I guess, since I am working at a separate office.

I'm driven to my apartment, where we drop off my stuff, find out I won't have internet until Monday, and make plans to get that, as well as a cell phone. We go out again to the bus station where I can get the bus times to get to work, then a member of the company shows me around my apartment and where the supermarket and such is. I eventually say my goodbyes, and am dropped off at the apartment.

I'm unpacking a little, but there are no 3 pronged plugs, so my laptop will only last so long until I get an adapter. Not to mention that I don't have internet. The apartment is actually really nice, and surprisingly large. I ran to the convenience store to buy toilet paper and some tea, but I really need a couch or something. Anyway, I'll probably unpack a little more, maybe walk around a bit, and shower. I have plans to meet with some more people tomorrow, so maybe then I'll be able to take care of everything else in the apartment.

Already Lost

I normally don't stay in downtown Tokyo, and for the most part, I avoid the area just because there's not much there that interests me. Well, my hotel is right next to the Shiodome and Ginza, which means it's true downtown Tokyo. I ran out to get something to eat, and when i got back, I couldn't use my ticket stub to leave the train station. It wouldn't take it for some reason. I assumed that I didn't put enough money on the ticket, so I went to a fare change machine to add some money to it. After not accepting the ticket, it finally took the ticket and kept it. So now I needed to buy a completely new ticket, because I didn't have mine anymore. I went to the guy working behind one of the counters at the exit, told him I lost my ticket, and he waved me through.

Now, this train station has atleast 8 different exits, and I wasn't paying attention when I went in to which exit was my hotel's. I ended up several blocks from my hotel, got directions, ran into horrible construction that made me walk 3 blocks out of my way to get around, and finally arrived back at the hotel. I'm still hungry...

Tokyo

My hotel bathroom has a giant glass wall that looks out into the room, then over the Tokyo skyline. I can shower, and look out of a giant panoramic window over Tokyo while naked. I love this place.

Not Remotely Related

I haven't left yet, and won't be until Thursday, so don't expect anything of substance until after then. I do feel the need to tell the tale of the Butter of the Beast, though. I found a box of butter in my apartment that expired on 06/06/06. In December, I was posting some items on ebay, when I thought to put the Butter of the Beast up for auction as well. I wrote a lengthy description, with a surprising number of errors in it, but it can all be found here:

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&rd=1&item=270062542680

Ofcourse no one buys it, but I didn't expect anybody to do so. Nearly a month later, on January 1st, I get an email from an ebay user named theg1963, that had a question about my auction. Below are the contents of the emails back and forth between myself, and this concerned ebay user:


theg1963: There is nothing paranormal about your butter the numbers are 060606. If it was 666 maybe and even then it's pretty stupid sounding an unbelievable to say the least

Me: I am glad that you took the time out of your busy day to point out that you have absolutely no sense of humor. Not to mention to comment on an auction long since ended. Maybe one day we can all be as cynical as you. Until then, one can only hope that your inability to catch sarcasm and parody remains a core characteristic of your personality. Happy New Year.

theg1963: I thought it was pretty stupid to put something like that on ebay. And the fact that i saw it on a website depicting what some people will try to sell for money

Me: Now you've piqued my curiosity as to what sort of website would find my auction enjoyable. If you get a chance, I would like the link to the site. I'm very curious what other sort of auctions were listed that could generate such scorn and animosity in people such as yourself. I would also like to thank you for taking the time to point out the differences between 06/06/06 and 666. Your eye for detail is appreciated. In addition, you have given me yet another wonderful story to tell. Thanks!

I still have not received any response, and my searches for the site have been unsuccessful.